31 December 2005

Wrapping Up 2005

Wrapping Up 2004
1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before? Saw Niagara Falls, graduated from college, got my first 9-5 salary based job, and rented my first apartment.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions and will you make more for next year? I didn’t make any this year. I wrote about it then. I can’t remember why I didn’t make any resolutions, but my grandma had been sick, I was kind of sick and tired of school, and I couldn’t think of any resolutions. This year I have a few. I want to work out more, eat better, drink more water, and improve my posture. I want to take more pictures and stay more focused at work. Yeah – loads of resolutions.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? No one close enough that I’ve seen any babies. I recently started reading blogs of two women who gave birth this year, my cousin had a baby boy and a girl who was a wilg pledge also had a baby this year, but I’m not really that close to any of these women.
4. Did anyone close to you die? My grandmother
5. What countries did you visit? Canada
6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005? A healthy relationship with myself
7. What date from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory and why? January 27th, because that’s the day my grandma passed away. On a happier note, December 10th will also be up there because that was the night of our Christmakwanzakkah party, and things. happened.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Finding a job, finding an apartment, and realizing that even though I needed my parents' help, for the most part I can stand on my own two feet.
9. What was your biggest failure? Conforming to someone else’s belief of what I “should” be and also not punching college boyfriend’s mom in the face. Not being able to be happy when I graduated, because I let someone else’s actions control my emotions.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? I had a broken heart, twice, and I was mildly depressed for a while, both after my grandma passed away and after I was broken up with. Other than that and the occasional cold/bird flu, I was fine.
11. What was the best thing you bought? Besides the noro cash iroha? Probably my Diesel jeans. I mean, I can’t think of any one thing that I bought that was awesome. Oh. The TV. The TV is god.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? Jessica’s. She didn’t punch me in the face at the Christmakwanzaakkah party – and I deserved it. But what’s more – she talked to me after that and made things ok. She also may agree with everyone else on the subject we were discussing, but she’s still on my side, anyway. She's also always there for me, and displayed that over and over and over again this year. And that, my friends, is a real friend.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Certain members of my family annoyed me at my grandmother’s funeral and in the days preceding the funeral. Come to think of it, some people are lucky they weren’t punched in the face..
14. Where did most of your money go? Most of my money was spent on movies, eating out, trips to New York and yarn. (haha - if you discount rent and the cable bill)
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, and Cowboy Mouth (I never made it to that concert,– but I’m superfuckingexcited about seeing them in March).
16. What song will always remind you of 2005? I can’t think of one because this year there was too much music – too many songs, and none that I related to a particular moment in time during 2005.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you: happier or sadder? It’s complicated. I am acutely miserable sometimes when I realize certain things about going “home,” and when I miss my grandma, or when I realize how much things have changed. However, right now, I’m starting a new relationship with someone I’m crazy about, and I’m excited about my new post-college life. So am I happier than I was at this exact time last year? Definitely. But do I miss my grandmother? Yes. A million times yes.
I’m in a more honest place, at any rate.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of? I wish I’d taken more pictures, spent more time knitting, and made more of an effort to exercise. I wish that I had relished in my happy moments longer.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of? I wish that I had done less pining, and less stupid things that I can “blame” on drinking. I wish I’d spent less time dwelling on those things, too.
20. How will you be spending Christmas? With my family, maybe around the tree, opening presents. Maybe we’ll go see a movie – I know we wanted to make that a tradition. At any rate, I can’t wait to see my cousins.
21. How will you be spending New Years? With Alisa. We have no concrete plans yet – I don’t know if they will involve being gussied up or if they will be plans that are more like…sweat pants and all the beer we still have left in the fridge – woohoo! Either way, it will be my roomie and me.
22. Did you fall in love in 2005? I don’t know if I fell in love. I fell out of love, and I care an unbelievable lot about a new someone, but to admit that it might be love? I’m not ready for that yet. Ask me in ’06.
23. How many one-night stands? Just the one.
24. What was your favorite TV program? Scrubs, Desperate Housewives, Gilmore Girls, Joan of Arcadia, Law and Order: SVU
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? I don’t hate anyone, no. I’m not very happy with someone right now. And the feeling is evidently more than mutual. Other than that, my shit list hasn’t really grown (nor has it gotten any smaller, let me tell you…).
26. What was the best book you read? Middlesex was pretty good. I stand by the old classics, though – like JD Salinger’s Nine Stories, and The Little Prince. Those are always good reads.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery? Radiohead? Franz Ferdinand? Probably a combination of the two, only Radiohead happened years ago. It was more of a re-discovery. A Christopher Columbus sort of thing, if you will. Both bands were bands that I “knew,” but I added them to my CD collection this year.
28. What did you want that you also ended up getting? Haha. [See December 10th reference above. Also, see job, apartment]
29. What did you want that you did not end up getting? I wanted to move in with college boyfriend, and I wanted to work things out with him. [You know what they say about unanswered prayers? Yeah…]
30. What was your favorite film of this year? Pride and Prejudice or Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. Rent. Syriana. I don’t know! Don’t make me choose!
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 21 this year and finally stopped holding up the party train! My friends took me to MoS at midnight between January 7th and 8th, and then the next night we went to dinner at the Cactus Club and to a few bars in the area. Then, I made them watch the Easter Egg on the Third Lord of the Rings DVD. Twice.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Less anxious squirming while waiting for certain decisions to be made. Or more support and less criticism from my mother.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005? Well, there were more sweatpants and pajama pants/tank top combinations in 2005 than in 2004. I blame many things for that. I still think I have a fairly sophisticated way of dressing, but I’m now more in love with knit clothing and the tight t-shirt/jean combo than ever (mostly bought knits – I mean all bought knits, since I have only made accessories thus far). There have also been far more jeans this year than last; more girl next door…less New York/LA.
34. What kept you sane? Well, not much to tell you the truth. Being with friends helped bring me down to earth, but things were pretty tense this year. Knitting helped, too.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Mark from Rent
36. What political issue stirred you the most? None. I had too many personal issues on my mind. I mean, the war, sure – but honestly…I don’t really care. It angers me, but…I just can’t muster enough anger.
37. Who did you miss? Besides my grandma? I missed Aurora and Sara more than ever for some reason. And I miss Peter. He should move out here. I missed all of my friends when they started moving away and Alisa and I were left with Jessica and Emily and Kristina...ugh (just kidding! Except about the part about missing Teresa and Lisa and Laura and Lindy)
38. Who was the best new person you met? I like Matt. Also, I like Jen from work.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005. I don’t know if I learned a valuable “life” lesson. I learned not to be so careless with my heart or careless with my friends’ hearts (but did I really learn that? In this particular case, I would probably do it all over again – if I were being honest with myself. And really…shut up anyone who thinks I didn’t learn the first part. I’m not careless; I’m just not so easily scared away by matters of the heart). I learned that you can’t rely on other people to be there for you – you can only rely on yourself, but I also learned that it’s okay to lean on friends for support – because if they’re real friends, they’ll lean back.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: Convince yourself that everything is alright 'cos it already is
I swapped my innocence for pride Crushed the end within my stride Said 'I'm strong now I know that I'm a leaver" I love the sound of you walking away Mascara bleeds a blackened tear And I am cold Yes I'm cold But not as cold as you are I love the sound of you walking away

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