19 May 2006

I don't care how amusing the arrow in your logo is. YOU SUCK, FEDEX.

Okay, y'all -- I am pissed, and I need to vent. I'm trying really hard to be one of those people who lets things go. It's tough, but I think I've made some progress lately (some is not a lot. It's not even a "good amount," 'k? It's "some"), and then today...just...gah.

So, FedEx made their second attempt to deliver my ipod today. This is fair, even though yesterday was a full six business days earlier than my ipod was to be delivered -- and I had planned this whole thing out so that I would be unemployed/home to accept said package. Heck, even though I missed it, I was thrilled because you sign the little paper and bam! Your delivery is left "without a signature." Awesome. Even though it wasn't my "plan," at least I'd have it today, right?


I've been so anxious to get to the end of today, because my ipod would be there, waiting for me, possibly with some light shining down on it from heaven. I have been so anxious, in fact, that I compulsively checked the shipping status whenever I could, waiting for it to say, "delivered" horray! Well, at 4PM -- FOUR, people -- the status was finally updated to "delivery exception," meaning that, yet again, my package was in Medford instead of my hot little hands. You fail, FedEx -- Eff Minus. Had the status been updated when I checked at 12, 1, 1:15, 2, 2:30, 3, or 3:15, I might have been able to sweetly finagle a dropoff today. As it is, I'll probably have to wait until Monday. That's THREE DAYS FROM RIGHT.NOW.

Now, when I called, I was sweet as pie at first, I promise. I asked what the deal was, and how to get around this. Chris was not helpful. No, this is not Chris' fault*. This isn't Apple's fault. Hell, this isn't my fault. There is ONE, and only one, person responsible for this screw-up and he was not on the other end of that phone but by-God, someone at FedEx was going to feel my pain, anger, and crushing disappointment. I hate you all!

I asked about Saturday delivery, and Chris told me that only if the shipper paid the $12 could they do Saturday (yeah, right).

I "can" wait until Monday. I'm an adult. I was going to wait until the 24th. And this isn't a matter of how long I can wait because I have no control over that. But also, if it's not dropped off on Monday, how am I going to get to Medford to pick up my package? Why am I being punished because some jerk at FedEx can't read/follow simple instructions like he's trained to do/pay attention?!

Is this because I lied to my grandma about eating those thin mints when I was six? Is this about the time I threw up in the sink and didn't tell anyone about it? IS IT? WHAT CAN I DO TO MAKE IT STOP, DEAR GOD, JUST TELL ME!


*Until Chris told me my package weighed 30lbs - then, he was at least a little bit to blame via the "stupidity clause." I tried to tell him what it was, explain that an ipod didn't weigh that much. That "package from Apple computers" did not equal "computer." Then I checked the website just now, to make sure Apple didn't screw up and ship me a computer. They didn't - the package weighs 0.3kg. I don't know what kind of crack Chris was smoking, but it was soooome crack.


Stephen said...

It's rare that I'd say about a woman, "Wow, those are some hot little hands on her." So before you make a statement like that, please post a picture of your hands so the readers of this blog can determine whether they're hot or not.

Sara said...

I feel the same way about FedEx. One of my graduation gifts was sent to me via FedEx and I never got it. Evidently someone else signed for it, whose last name was like Thompson or Tucker, nothing NEAR my last name, and now my package is being enjoyed by someone else. Who lets someone else sign for a package like that? It obviously had to be the wrong apartment because we don't even have people in the front office with that name. Stupid FedEx!