30 March 2006

It's Like Riding a Bike


My ipod made it through my entire run today. There was [over!] thirty minutes of continuous play, and I was so proud of it I almost cried. I'll still be buying a nano when I get my first paycheck, because it's just an ipod, not a child, and I will feel no remorse trading it in. Ok - I'll feel a pang of remorse, but that's it, I swear!

My real reason for updating for the third time today, though, is that I needed to document something. I felt it today - that feeling that being alone right now is okay. I don't just mean sans-boyfriend, because it's deeper than that and almost completely unrelated. I remember when college boyfriend first moved to New York, and after a few months of adjustment, I started enjoying having an excuse to just be alone without feeling guilty that I wasn't spending time with him or even thinking about him, and I started *gasp* enjoying the moments of peace and solitude. A similar feeling of contentment washed over me today; I was alone with my thoughts and my music and myself and just being. I felt warm from the inside out, and I was glowing, pulsating - I was alive for the first time in a long time. The running helped. The warm sun on my face helped. The guy with the Smiths shirt and the burgundy leather jacket who smiled at me helped, but mostly it was just that I was happy.

My playlist today was also something to be envied. I hadn't quite found the right mix, yet - sometimes some songs were too slow, or they weren't fast enough, or didn't have that beat - that one that makes you want to get up and dance. Here's the rundown:
The Subways - Oh Yeah
Fall Out Boy - Sugar, We're Going Down
Stars - What I'm Trying To Say
Rilo Kiley - It's A Hit
The Killers - Mr. Brightside
Stars - One More Night
Green Day - Church on Sunday
Jenny Lewis and The Watson Twins - You Are What You Love
Rilo Kiley - Go Ahead
It was perfect for a thirty minute run (The Subways came on again just as I came up to our street), and it was the perfect mix of dance dance and melancholy. It was good.

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